No, You May NOT Pick My Brain

Some of us are softies. We say “yes” to (almost) everything anybody asks. We give up our time and knowledge freely every day. Not that there’s anything wrong with it of course. But sometimes, you go out of your way for someone that doesn’t end up appreciating it all that much.

I know, I’ve been there.

That’s what the following slide-deck is about. It’s a neat over-view on how/when to say “NO” and what to do the next time someone wants to pick your brain: (slide-deck via Sheila Scarborough)

So, what do you say when someone asks you out for coffee to pick your brain?

Comments

  1. says

    Well didn’t you hit the nail on the head for me with this one…Yes I am a softie, and boy do I end up suffering for it.

    My philosophy has always been to help where you can, but I’ve found people can suck you dry, and it leaves you feeling cynical and resentful. (which is not how I want to feel)

    Learning to say no, is challenging but I know for self preservation, a necessity.  
    The slideshare has given me a few ideas for how to incorporate “no” in a way that I’m comfortable with.

    Thanks

    Btw…lovin the new design of the site.

    • says

      Jackie: you and I are on the same boat. Like I said, I’m a softy and I’ve been there. I say yes to a lot of things and unfortunately, there’s been those occasions where you come to regret it.

      The problem is, there are those people that push the limits and as you said they “suck you dry”. And the resulting feeling isn’t so great.

      Sometimes, saying no is difficult. But there comes a point, where you just have to draw the line. And I think that’s what I’ve come to appreciate about this slide-deck. Sheila raises some really solid and fair points about when to say no.

      Anyway, I’m really glad that it inspired you to think about how you operate (when you say yes and when to say no). That’s important. Very, very important.

      And thank you for the compliment on the always changing site design :-) You rock!

    • says

      Jackie: you and I are on the same boat. Like I said, I’m a softy and I’ve been there. I say yes to a lot of things and unfortunately, there’s been those occasions where you come to regret it.

      The problem is, there are those people that push the limits and as you said they “suck you dry”. And the resulting feeling isn’t so great.

      Sometimes, saying no is difficult. But there comes a point, where you just have to draw the line. And I think that’s what I’ve come to appreciate about this slide-deck. Sheila raises some really solid and fair points about when to say no.

      Anyway, I’m really glad that it inspired you to think about how you operate (when you say yes and when to say no). That’s important. Very, very important.

      And thank you for the compliment on the always changing site design :-) You rock!

    • says

      Ohhh yeeaaahh! That’s right… I remember.

      I was gonna write a blog post, then came across this slide-deck. I think she nailed some solid and fair points in there. At some point, you just gotta draw the line ya know.

        • says

          Re: “Brain pickers are like people who ask for some of your fries and end up eating them all.”

          LOLz! You know, I’ve known one or two of those people… I don’t ever wanna share my fries with them again :-P

  2. Anonymous says

    Loved the slideshow, hated the popup that got between me and it all of a sudden. BIG turnoff. Sorry. I almost stopped reading right there and then.

    Now that we got that out of the way – very valid points. People find it hard to accept that certain intangibles, like skills, come at a price. It’s like when Picasso doodled on a restaurant napkin and then, when somebody offered to buy the doodle, he asked for thousands of dollars. The buyer protested. “It only took you five minutes!” To which Picasso replied, “Yes, five minutes and a lifetime.”

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